Improving Your Communication
Communication comes in many forms. Whether it’s what you’re saying to someone else or yourself, how you say it, how your body is talking and how you listen are all forms of communication.
Many Men feel like they lack the confidence in their communication capabilities, which can often show up as being passive or passive aggressive in how they communicate to the world around themselves and even how they talk about/to themselves. Being able to clearly articulate your inner experience and needs outwards to the world is a skill that too few of us are taught growing up, especially boys who get bombarded with language of how they should be showing up or to quit showing up in a way that all they know.
Generally the level to which we are able to communicate externally is the level in which we feel comfortable being with our inner experience. It also is the level in which we are able to actively listen to another person, which is a skill in itself.
Working on your Communication helps you deepen your relationships with others whether it’s friends or a romantic partner and show up assertively in conversations that can include conflict. Conflict is something that is going to be natural and shows up in our everyday life, so our ability to communicate through conflict is important in ensuring that we are able to hear the other person and what they are saying along with ensuring what we say is not including judgement, defensiveness, or shaming.
For communication, there are layers to learn to properly share with others what’s on your mind, your feelings, and having open communication through conflict. A big issue that tends to pop up for Men in communication is that aggression or passivity shows up when conflict arises whether it’s with your romantic partner, friends, or at work. This occurs most likely because you have a block in communicating your internal experience to the external world. Blocks can occur when you’ve experienced childhood traumas, attachment wounds, or grew up in an environment that wasn’t able to provide you with the skills to assertively share your experience with others.